


A Love Lost, A Love Found

by mihomi98



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-20
Updated: 2015-04-20
Packaged: 2018-03-25 00:25:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,922
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3789778
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mihomi98/pseuds/mihomi98
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry broke up with Draco to protect him, but when Harry sees Draco ten years later, will he be able to win the man he's in love with back? Companion piece to my story "Break Even." Draco/Harry</p><p>Repost from fanfiction.net. Written in 2011.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Love Lost, A Love Found

Harry stood outside of the entrance to the Room of Requirement, twisting the engagement ring that circled his ring finger, tears making their way down his face. He knew that what he what he was about to do would destroy him, but it'd be better in the long run. Draco would stay safe and Harry wouldn't need to worry that Voldemort would use Draco as bait like he did Draco. Harry took a deep breath and wiped the tears from his face before opening the door to the room.

 _Merlin, I can't do this…._ Harry thought as he saw Draco sitting on the couch. When Draco stood to hug Harry, it took all of Harry's willpower to not pull Draco into a kiss. He felt cold as Draco pulled away. He led Draco to the couch, telling him that they needed to talk.

"I want to break up," Harry said softly, his words breaking his own heart. "It's not working anymore, Draco. I can't do this." The words sounded fake even to Harry's ears, but they were the best that he could do. "I just can't be with you."

Draco's eyes welled up with tears before he blinked hurriedly. "What did I do wrong? Tell me what it is, Harry, and I'll try to change it. Please, don't end this," he pleaded. Harry's heart shattered even further as he saw the pain and heartbreak in his lover's eyes. He hated knowing that he was the cause of that pain.

 _God, I don't want to do this…_ Harry struggled to come up with another lie. "I just…. I don't love you anymore, Draco. I've found somebody else." Draco's face fell even more, if that was possible. Harry bit his lip and turned his eyes to the floor, no longer able to look the blonde Adonis in the eyes.

Suddenly, Draco stood up. "I hope you're happy with them, Harry. Goodbye," he said in a tight voice, a sure sign that he was about to burst into tears. He turned and ran out of the room as Harry's inner voice screamed at him to come back.  _Fight back, Draco! Make me stay with you! Don't just let me end things, force me to explain everything!_ But Draco wasn't coming back. Harry stared at the door mournfully for several minutes before he buried his face in hands and began to sob loudly.

"What the fuck did I just do?" Harry asked himself out loud. Even though Harry and Draco had only been broken up for a few minutes, he already wanted Draco back more than anything. He began to twist his engagement ring once again, watching his tears hit the gold metal band. Harry had planned on spending the rest of his life with Draco, he really had, and maybe he'd try again after the war was over, but for the moment….. Harry knew that he had made the right choice, even if his heart would be broken and Draco would hate him.

Harry took a deep breath and wiped his eyes furiously, forcing himself to stop crying. He pushed himself off the couch and went over to a mirror in the side of the room, wincing when he saw his reflection. His eyes were red and swollen and it was obvious that he had been crying. His heartbreak was to be expected, though. He and Draco  _had_ been together for two years, and they  _were_ supposed to be getting married in a few months…. Hermione and Ron would understand why he was upset. Harry let out another shaky breath before leaving the room and making his way back to the Gryffindor dorm. He believed that his friends were most likely there.

Sure enough, when Harry walked through the portrait of the Fat Lady, Hermione and Ron were bickering in the common room. They stopped midsentence when they saw Harry though.

"Oh my gosh, Harry, what's wrong? Why are you crying?" Hermione asked, moving forward to hug her friend. Harry put his arms around the bookworm and buried his face in her hair. He pulled out of the hug and sat down in on the couch beside Ron.

"Did Malfoy do something to you?" Ron accused angrily. "If he hurt you, I swear I'll kill—"

"He didn't hurt me, Ron," Harry said, cutting the hot-tempered boy off. "I hurt myself by hurting Draco."

Hermione kneeled in front of Harry, putting her hand on his arm. "Oh, Harry, what did you do?"

Harry was quiet. He bit his lip before he spoke. "I ended things with Draco," he whispered brokenly. "I made up some bullshit lie about loving someone else and I broke up with him." Harry threw a cushion across the room angrily before putting his head in his hands again and groaning.

Hermione and Ron shared a mischievous look before comforting their friend. "It'll be okay, Harry," Hermione assured him, patting him on the shoulder. "You'll find someone better to be with after the war is over."

"Do you guys think I did the right thing? Should I have talked to Draco about what was going on or am I saving him more by not worrying him about it?"

"You did the right thing," Ron answered. "You need to focus on defeating Vol… Vol…. Ugh, You-Know-Who. You don't need Malfoy distracting you from what's important."

Harry nodded. "You're right. I need to focus." He twisted his ring again before standing up. He paused before putting the ring on the table, deciding he couldn't keep it with him. Hermione would take care of it for him. "I'm going to just go to bed, you guys. I don't feel up to doing anything tonight." Hermione and Ron nodded.

Harry climbed the stairs to his room. He collapsed on his bed as soon as he reached it. Tears started falling again, and his heart ached something fierce. Harry turned to his side and used his pillow to muffle his sobs until he fell into a fitful sleep, his dreams haunted with memories of the last two years.

XXXTEN YEARS LATER XXX

TEN YEARS LATER

"Wake up, Harry!" came Blaise's voice through the door to Harry's room in their shared apartment. Rumors had started as soon as they payed rent for the first time that Harry and Blaise were a couple, but they definitely weren't. They would never work as a couple, and now that Ron and Hermione lived with them as well, there wouldn't be a chance even if Harry were interested in Blaise. He and Hermione had been fuck-buddies for as long as she had been living there. Harry glared at the door before going back to his position of glaring at the calendar next to his bed. He hadn't gotten any sleep the night before of this date. July 18, 2007. Blaise knocked again before forcing the door open and coming in. "Oh, you're awake."

"No shit."

Blaise chuckled. "Someone is in a bad mood this morning." Harry threw a pillow at him. "Hey! What's got you so sour?" Harry nodded at the calendar. Blaise looked at him in confusion.

"Seriously, dude?" Harry said in annoyance. "You don't remember what today's date stands for?" Blaise shook his head before his eyes widened.

"Oh. Today would have signified you and Draco being married for ten years, wouldn't it," Blaise commented. Harry nodded sadly. Blaise sat down at the foot of the bed. "Harry, why don't you try and win him back?"

Harry shook his head. "Draco hates me. I hurt him so bad, he has to hate me," Harry reminded Blaise softly. "Plus Hermione and Ron had such a problem with me being with him the first time, they would hate him even more the second time around. They wouldn't want anything to do with him."

Blaise shook his head. "Look, Harry, I love Hermione more than anything, but she isn't right all the time. You and Draco, you're meant to be together. Ron and Hermione will be fine which whatever you decide."

Harry sighed. "Yeah, I guess… they've just been such a big part of my time for so long that I want them to approve of the person that I love."

Blaise nodded in understanding. "I get that. But hey, let's get out of this room, yeah? Get some food in you and some coffee. That'll lift you up some." Harry chuckled and the boys made their way into the kitchen where Ron and Hermione were talking about Ron's newfound relationship with Luna. Blaise got breakfast for himself and Harry.

"How're you this morning, Harry? Did you sleep well?" Hermione asked Harry. He didn't answer, deciding instead to simply shrug. Obviously neither of his friends remembered the date either. He slid into the chair next to Ron, thanking Blaise for the cereal.

Blaise sat down across from him. "So, Harry, if I knew where you could see him again, would you want to?"

Hermione sat up straighter. "Ooh, who are we talking about? Is there a new man in your life, Harry, that you haven't been telling us about?"

Harry shook his head. "No, Hermione, there's not."

Blaise turned to his girlfriend. "Hermione, we're talking about Draco." Hermione's back stiffened.

"Blaise, no. There's no reason for Harry to see Draco again. Why would he even want to?" Hermione shook her head. Harry's shoulders slumped. He knew that Hermione wouldn't approve.

Ron jumped in." I agree. That douche bag hasn't been in our lives for a decade, why would we ever want him back in our lives? He's not worth our breath."

Blaise narrowed his eyes irately. "What's wrong with you two? Can't you see beyond your past issues with Draco to see how happy he made Harry? Can't you see how much this day is hurting him?"

"Why would today be any different than any other day?" Ron asked.

Suddenly, Harry exploded. "Merlin, don't you guys pay attention to  _anything_ in my life? As my best friends you guys should know that today would have been my ten year anniversary with Draco. I'm still so fucking in love with him and all you two can say is how he's not worth anything. He's worth  _everything_! I'd do anything to get him back. And you know what? I may have ended things with him because Voldemort was after me, but I didn't try to contact him because I knew that even if he miraculously didn't hate me, you guys would! And Blaise, yes, I would love to see him again if I could. I miss  _everything_ about him." By the end of his rant, Harry was out of breath and his vision was blurred with tears.

Hermione and Ron looked at each other guiltily before turning back to Harry. "Harry…" Hermione started slowly. "You… you really love Draco, don't you."

"Of course I do, Hermione," Harry answered. "I always have."

Hermione sighed before looking at her boyfriend. "Okay, Blaise. When can we see Draco again?"

Blaise cocked his eyebrow. "We? Is that to say that you want to come with us?"

Hermione nodded. "If Harry really loves Draco as much as he says, then maybe Draco's not a bad guy. I want to see what Harry sees in him."

Harry beamed, jumping up and hugging his friend. "Oh, thank you Hermione." As he pulled back, his smile faltered. "He's probably moved on though. Someone as beautiful as him has to have found someone by now."

"Actually, he hasn't," Blaise admitted. "According to Pansy, he takes this date just as hard as you do. And as for when you can see him… I kind of already told Pansy that we would be at Draco's concert tonight. He doesn't have any idea though. Are you up for it?"

Harry nodded enthusiastically. "Let's do it."

XXX

Later that night, the trio was standing in the back of Theodore Nott's bar where Draco was performing, and Draco was nearly done with his set list. Harry was staring at his ex-fiancée in awe, his eyes never leaving the stage. He had never seen Draco so beautiful in his grey skinny jeans and white v-neck. Seeing Draco again confirmed for Harry everything that he already knew: he had to be with this man forever. He needed him in his life.

When Draco introduced his last song, Harry felt his heart stop. "You guys have been a wonderful audience," Draco began, smiling as he looked around the room. "I have one more song to play, and it's a bit different than the rest of my songs that I've played tonight. Even though I highly doubt the person this next song is about will ever hear this, it's something I've needed to say since me and him broke up, even if I'm saying it to a bunch of people who won't really care about the meaning. When I was in my seventh year of school, I was engaged to the most amazing man that I've ever met in my entire life. He fell in love with someone else and ended things with me. Unfortunately, I still can't get him out of my head and I'm still completely in love with him. I miss him more than anything in the world, even though he broke my heart and it still hasn't healed."

Hermione nudged Harry, giving him a look that screamed  _Take your chance!_ Harry nodded and locked his eyes back on the stage, his heart racing as Draco started the song.

_I'm still alive but I'm barely breathing,_ __  
_Just prayed to a god that I don't believe in,_ __  
_'Coz I got time while he got freedom,_ __  
_'Coz when a heart breaks_ _  
_ _no it don't break even._

_His best days will be some of my worst,_ __  
_He finally met a man that's gonna put him first,_ __  
_While I'm wide awake, he's no trouble sleeping,_ __  
_'Coz when a heart breaks_ _  
_ _no it don't break even, even no._

_What am I supposed to do when the best part of me was always you_ __  
_What am I supposed to say when I'm all choked up and you're ok_ __  
_I'm falling to pieces_ _  
_ _I'm falling to pieces_

The lights bounced off Draco's face, allowing Harry to see that the other man had begun to cry. Harry could feel his own tears dripping down his cheeks and mixing with his drink that sat on the table he was leaning against.

_They say bad things happen for a reason_ __  
_But no wise words gonna stop the bleeding_ __  
_'Coz he's moved on while I'm still grieving_ __  
_And when a heart breaks_ _  
_ _no it don't break even, even no._

_What am I gonna do when the best part of me was always you_ __  
_What am I supposed to say when I'm all choked up and you're ok_ __  
_I'm falling to pieces, yeah_ __  
_I'm falling to pieces, yeah_ __  
_I'm falling to pieces_ __  


The words to the song were getting more and more muffled as Draco started to cry harder. By this point, Harry was openly sobbing, finally realizing just much he had hurt Draco. His tears weren't just of pain, though. He was also crying out of the joy of knowing that Draco was still just in love with Harry as Harry was with him.

_You got his heart and my heart and none of the pain,_ __  
_You took your suitcase, I took the blame._ __  
_Now I'm tryna make sense of what little remains, oh._ _  
_ _'Coz you left me with no love, with no love to my name._

_I'm still alive but I'm barely breathing,_ __  
_Just prayed to a god that I don't believe in,_ __  
_'Coz I got time while she got freedom,_ __  
_'Coz when a heart breaks_ __  
_no it don't break, no it don't_ _  
_ _break, no it don't break even_

Draco's voice cut off as his tears became too much for him. Harry watched as Draco walked backstage with his guitar in hand. Something snapped in Harry when he saw how broken Draco looked, and he quickly stood up and pushed his way through the crowd until he saw the door that led backstage. He took a deep breath before pushing the door open and walking in. Harry spotted Draco sitting against a wall, his legs pulled up against his chest. Harry couldn't help it, he had to hold Draco in his arms.

Harry reached down and yanked Draco into a standing pose against his body, Draco's head on Harry's chest. Draco yelped at the change in position. Harry buried his head in Draco's neck, sobbing. Harry didn't even consider the fact that Draco might freak out when some random man is crying against him, but fortunately, that wasn't an issue. Draco pulled out of the embrace to look Harry in the eyes, whispering his name. Harry nodded and pulled Draco as close as he possibly could when Draco hugged him.

Harry loosened his grip so that he could pull Draco into a passionate kiss. When the men broke apart, Draco was staring at Harry dreamily. "Are you real or am I imaging things?" Draco whispered, his eyes searching Harry's.

Harry laughed softly. "I'm really here, Dray."

Draco pulled Harry closer. Harry breathed in Draco's sent deeply as he wiped both his and Draco's tears away. Draco rested his head on Harry's shoulder. "I've missed you so fucking much, Harry."

Harry pulled Draco closer once more. "I've missed you, too. I love you so much. I was such an idiot for breaking up with you. I miss you. I love you." Harry pulled Draco into another kiss, until a cough was heard from the corner. It was Hermione. Harry was confused when Draco paled. Hermione nervously made eye contact with Draco.

"Mal—Draco, Pansy sent me back here to tell you that your manager wants you to go ahead and head home." Draco nodded started to walk towards the door, Harry close behind. The boys stopped when Hermione called Draco's name. "Oh, and Draco? I'm sorry about… you know. What I said." Draco nodded coldly and quickly walked out of the door, through the club, and outside. Harry sent Hermione a confused look before running about the blonde. He had no idea what just happened.

When Harry caught up with Draco, he asked, "Dray, what did she mean 'what she said'? What she said when?" Harry cocked his head to the side in confusion. Draco bit his lip and looked at the ground. "When did you two talk?"

Draco took a moment before saying anything. "I haven't spoken to her since the breakup, but some of the things she and Weasley said to me the day after you broke up with me… some were pretty hurtful."

Harry was still confused. "What did they say?" Draco shook his head. Harry leaned their foreheads together and kissed Draco on the nose. "Dray, tell me."

Draco took a deep breath. "They told me that you were bound to find someone better sooner or later, even if we got married. And they said…." Draco cut off, tears starting again as he remembered.

Harry put his hand under Draco's chin and tilted the boy's head up. "Baby, tell me. What did they say that upset you so much?"

"They said that if I honestly believed that you wanted to spend the rest of your life with me, I was dumber than everyone thought I was," Draco said in a small voice. "Then Weasley threw this at me." Draco reached into his pocket and pulled out a ring. Harry's eyes widened as he realized that it was the same ring Draco had proposed to him with so many years back.

"Is that…?" Harry started. When Draco nodded, Harry felt horrible. "Oh, Draco…. I'm so sorry." Draco shrugged before going silent for a few moments.

When Draco finally spoke again, he asked a question he wasn't sure he wanted to know the answer to. "Why did you break up with me? Did you really find someone else? I mean, you deserve way better than me but….."

"Draco," Harry interrupted. "There is no one more perfect for me than you."

"Then why did you end things? If you loved me and wanted to be with me, why did you tell me that you have fallen in love with someone else?" Harry wasn't sure how to answer. Did he want to tell the truth and risk Draco getting angry at him? He decided that lying wouldn't get him anywhere, and told the truth.

"Voldemort was finding ways to get to me, and I didn't want you to be one of the ways. Voldemort used Sirius as bait, and he ended up dying because I was close to him." Harry looked up and locked eyes with Draco, trying to force him to understand. "I couldn't let that happen to you, Draco. I just couldn't, I wouldn't be able to live if I was the reason for you being dead."

"Why didn't you tell me any of this? Or why didn't you at least contact me after the war?"

"I thought you hated me," Harry answered in a small, broken voice. He cast his eyes down. "I broke your heart. You should've hated me."

"I could never hate you, Harry."

Harry looked back up. "It hurt so much to break up with you. I was hoping that you'd fight back, that you'd know I was lying about their being someone else so I wouldn't have to go through with my plan, but you just went along with it. Why?" Draco placed his head on Harry's shoulder, but didn't respond. Harry kissed Draco on the head. "You don't have to answer if you don't want to, it's fine."

Draco whispered his reason so softly that Harry had to strain his ears to hear it. "I didn't fight back because…. I was so hurt and so scared. When you and I got together, I told myself that if you ever found someone else I'd let you go no matter how much it hurt me."

"You really loved me back then, didn't you? You weren't just messing with my heart?"

Draco's eyes went wide. "How could you ever think I was messing with your heart?" Harry shrugged. In all honesty, he always thought that Draco could find someone so much more beautiful and perfect for himself than Harry. Perhaps Draco really always had been as desperately in love as Harry had been. "Harry, I would've died if it had meant that it's save you. I still would." Draco kissed Harry passionately before declaring, "I've known ever since we started becoming friends that I wanted to be with you forever and nothing will  _ever_ make me stop loving you. Hell, I've spent ten years telling myself that I needed to get over you, and yet I'm still crazy about you. I swear I have  _never_ messed with your heart."

Harry's heart swelled, and he fell even more in love with Draco. "Draco, answer me honestly. Do you want to give us another try?" When Draco nodded, Harry was filled with an overwhelming joy. Harry sighed happily. "Thank God." He pushed Draco against a wall, loving the feel of the blonde pressed against him as they snogged. He missed this more than anything. He couldn't remember feeling this content, this at  _home_ in such a long time.

Harry knew that this, being with Draco, was where he belonged, and with Draco is where he would stay for the rest of his life.

And they lived happily ever after.


End file.
